I never had more fun writing a column than last August when I drew up a list of 10 songs that I thought would be kickass college football entrances. I loved it so much that I'm gonna do it again this year to celebrate the fast approaching return of college football. I doubt anyone will be reading this one, but its still damn fun to do, bringing back some fun memories.
For "Lick Our Asses, You Uneducated Snobs": . Seeing Fatboy Slim bust this out at the London Olympics closing ceremony got me thinking. The slow build up. The dramatic strings. The big beat when it comes in. Perfect college football entrance. I can picture a team trying this one from across the pond.
Teams it would work for: Anyplace with a grand, epic tradition, snobbish demeanor and European roots. ex. Notre Dame, Harvard, Stanford, Duke.
For The HUUGE Drop:
Having gone to several festivals and EDM club shows over the last year, I have witnessed the power of the drop. If you're a DJ it's the one tool that's a surefire way to bring the animal out of this generation of college-aged kids.
Teams it could work for: I'd honestly love to see that anywhere. If I had to guess I'd say somewhere in the Midwest; there is a crazy energy out there, and they do love their techno. Iowa State, Indiana State, Mizzou, even Michigan (where Tiesto is booked for this fall). Or UNLV and "The U", since Vegas and Miami are epicenters for electronic music. Some school, any school, has gotta take this and run with it.
For "Party Like It's 1989":
Only once in my lifetime have I heard this song at a party, and it happens to be one of the best parties I went to in college. The crowd went crazy when it hit and everyone cheered after every verse as if the band was there. From all accounts, college kids of the 1980s knew how to party, and REM was the finest college rock band. I'd love to hear a school go retro and blast this song.
Schools it would work for: UGA would be the lead candidate since REM are from Athens, also any school with a "nerdy" or quirky academic base; Northwestern, Vanderbilt, BC, Georgia Tech.
For That Perfect Victory:
You know sometimes how a band closes their concert with a song so perfect that everyone's group-singing it on the way out and randomly cheering in the streets because that last song left them feeling so damn good? It's the same feeling with sports. I done met and seen a lot of people and nothing leaves them feeling better in this life than being there to see their team beat a #1 or get that W over their hated rival. It's gotta be a HUGE rally-the-troops singalong, something timeless on the scale of "Build Me Up Buttercup" or "Sweet Caroline" or "Livin' on a Prayer".
For my money, I nominate "We Are Young" by Fun. College really is the best time in a young person's life, and it's been a long time since I heard the message of celebrating youth come out in a chorus like this. If I were in college right now I'd be playing this all day. I've seen this live, and it's the real deal. This would be my morning tailgate rallying cry, the 3AM last-call singalong and the last thing we hear when we leave the stadium delirious after the big win.
Schools it could work for: Obviously anyone with the HUGE stadium: the Big House, the Swamp, Rocky Top, the Rose Bowl, Autzen, Death Valley. This is the song this year to send 80,000 American kids home happy. Mark my words. Avicii and Carly Rae? Played out. Fun. is here to stay.
For The Halloween Game:
I know an indie-rock band from Brooklyn doesn't exactly scream football, but there is slow-burning menace to this track that makes it the perfect fit for a zombie parade or a Halloween costume party or better yet, a Halloween weekend game. This song is too dark for radio, too heavy for today's music climate. But it would be perfect for a crowd with 60,000 kids in costume, the defense making a final stand, and everyone chomping at the gate to rush the field.
Teams it could work for: Anywhere with dark colors, a scary-looking mascot, or passion for Halloween. New Mexico, UTEP, Virginia Tech, Texas Tech, Houston, even Ohio State.
For The Boss:
I know Ross is mainstream as it gets right now, and I used a Ross cut in last year's list, but there's something about the former linebacker's beats which just works really well for football. This song in particular I can see any football team with a sizeable "urban" student body completely wilding out to during timeouts. Speaking of which, a stadium-wide "Dougie" session is always welcome, but too cliche by now to make this list.
Schools it can work for: UCF, Howard, GTech, SMU, Richmond, Cincinnati.
For "Let's Fucking RIOT!": If you haven't stormed the field or rioted over a major sports result, then chances are you went to the wrong school. There's so much energy among college kids that it's only human nature they will riot over something sooner or later. If you've never seen a major field rush before it's quite the scene. The kids go apeshit crazy, and none of the "adults" on the scene have any idea what to say or do. Sometimes the ref will throw a flag or the PA announcer will tell kids to get back in their seats, but it's too late. I would love it if instead of trying to calm the stadium down, there was a programming coordinator who completely flipped shit and put on music for the kids to go nuts to. Something primitive and thunderous; some RATM, some Priest or Metallica or...
It's ironic if played at a college stadium, because the whole point of college (which costs these kids and their parents 20-60 thousand dollars a year) is to prepare these young men and women to join the workforce, which is exactly what this song is railing against. But if this is played at the height of a victory celebration, kids will be too drunk and crazy and ecstatic to get the point of the song. I love it when the field turns into a massive riot zone that no campus policeman can stop.
Schools it can work for: Anywhere they riot and tear down goalposts and storm fields after wins. Some good ones in recent years have happened after major upsets at Mizzou, Iowa State, Wisconsin, and Texas Tech
For "We Eat, Breathe, And SLEEP FOOTBALL!!"
This is as close to a "classic" hip-hop football pumpup as you get. Rap music is produced so quickly and has so many one-hit wonders that it's nearly impossible to have a shelf life like this song. This hit in late summer 2003, headlined the Madden 04 soundtrack, and has become a booming tailgate staple in years since, especially down in the deep South. This song hits home with football, because of the linebacker size of the rapper and no-intimidation grit of the chorus. This could work for the team's entrance music or if it's late in the 4th and the home team has a shot at the big upset. Bring it back! I ain't neva scurred!
Teams it can work for: Mississippi State, Alabama, Troy, Arkansas St, LSU, Florida St.
For A Surefire Tailgate Starter:
I've been obsessed with this Camp album lately. This is Donald Glover from NBC's Community doing his own spin on Kanye/Drake/Weezy boast rap. I seen him at Lollapalooza and Central Park, I know the kids love this style of rap. Especially with the tornado siren horn at the beginning I see this blaring at the tailgate when the kids are getting hyped for the game and gettin' their drink on.
Teams it can work for: Anywhere with a big frat row and awesome tailgate scene; your USC, Michigan, Penn State, UF, Oklahoma.
For what kids will ACTUALLY crank this fall. Most likely, the songs kids are likely to blast at tailgates and wild out to at games are Flo Rida's Whistle, Avicii's Levels, Carly Rae's Call Me Maybe (sure to be a sorority favorite), Taio Cruz's Hangover, everything by Drake, and maybe some Hey Baby or Build me Up Buttercup or Country Roads for old time's sake. Whatever they listen to, the students about to go back to college are in the most fun time of their lives and they shouldn't take any tailgate, any game, any party or big win for granted. Trust me. Man I love seeing those crowds. If only they played some cooler music...
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