Top 11 Companies Americans Were Complaining About in 2011

You can't take part in a casual conversation without hearing the familiar rants:
"Man, fuck T-Mobile. They give me no bars anywhere!"
"AT&T is such a piece of shit. My coworker got the Verizon IPhone and he tells me I should switch over, but we just can't afford it"
"What the fuck is up with Bank of America? Are they charging me fees or not?"

Here are the 11 companies that Americans really couldn't stop complaining about in 2011:

1. T-Mobile. Probably the most complained about company of the last 10 years. Somewhere in America right now, at some lunch table, in some corporate break room, there is a guy complaining about his T-Mobile service. Their clever & inspiring-looking advertising, with empty slogans such as "More 4G Coverage" air at just about every football or TV public watch party, and are usually followed by someone yelling "Fuck T-Mobile!" or a universal round of boos.

2. CNN. The channel most Americans go to for their news programming is the go-to news station for restaurants & small businesses to turn on when there is nothing else on TV, and is also among the most complained about companies. They are known to post & air the most bullshit stories, celebrity gossip, and things that happened to some guy that no one cares about, that they can put under the label of News. The other week in midtown Manhattan, when passing a major news TV-viewing post, a drone went off on a major rant about Wolf Blitzer and how "stupid and uninformed" the anchors are. Everyone in his group promptly agreed, causing one of his friends or coworkers to start a pretend chant of "Fuck Wolf Blit-Zer!" The same can be said about overpriveleged prince Anderson Cooper, the network's poster boy & golden child.

3. AT&T. Their slogan "Rethink Possible" should be rerouted as 'Rethink Dropped Calls." They are universally accepted as the most overrated cell phone service in the game right now, dropping more calls in more places than Americans know what to do with, except for complain. They also fill up the most annoying advertising airtime during popular television out of any major provider save maybe T-Suckile. Their other slogan, "More Bars In More Places" inspires more revolt

4. Bank of America. Fees, fees, and more fees for America's most used and insolvent bank. 20 minute ATM waits, overdraft fees, deposit fees, threat of maintenance fees JUST FOR HAVING A DEBIT CARD (a move which was wisely averted thanks to a customer revolt). 20 minutes on your phone bill to wait for customer service anytime you are having an issue. You get the point.

5. Verizon. Even though they are universally acknowledged as the most dependable cell phone provider, everyone who has them still finds something to complain about; namely the cost of their service. We are in a tough economic times that's for certain. But even workers who earn $60,000 a year will complain nonstop about forking over 200 bucks a month for a cell phone service that doesn't drop calls and can give you an automatic wireless hotspot upon request. Then there's the whiners in other cell phone providers who are always saying "I SHOULD" or "We COULD switch to Verizon and not have to deal with all my bullshit", but ultimately they never do & are stuck ruining your office's holiday party or happy hour by complaining the whole night about AT&T.

6. Facebook. Love them or hate them, you ARE a Facebook user in 2011. There's just no way you haven't at least considered opening a facebook account, after seeing "The Social Network" be the movie of the year and having heard about just about every person you've ever known asking you if you're on Facebook. With so many damn people using the site, they're going to find something to complain about sooner or later. For many, it's the privacy, and how people can see such-and-such. For others, it's how they think no one freakin' cares about people's posts. For others, it's the constant updates & changes to the site which their six figure salary developers in California often implement, maybe just to screw with people. Every one they make produces a firestorm of "Has Facebook jumped the shark" criticism, but somehow they still do it without caring & the people will still continue to use the site. It don't cost you a thing, but you people still can't stop saying 'Fuck Facebook", saying how you keep wanting to get off the site but never do, on and on and on.

7. Chase. Their annoying ads. Chase freedom. Chase what matters. Their annoying soft talker who does the voiceover. Their $500 credit lines on cards they advertise as getting thousands in cash back, due to confusing policies that make little sense. Their confusing website & online banking signup process. Their mobile app that apparently lets you deposit checks by phone but still no one seems to like. Their FEES, fees, fees. They're on this list.

8. Ticketmaster/Live Nation. Now that a conglomerate has been formed for the ticketing industry, consumers of sports, concerts & theater still cannot stop complaining about how damn expensive their favorite team or favorite band is. With parking, beer, & merch prices skyrocketing in a down economy you will hear it from the fans. "We just can't afford it anymore", etc, etc. I notice that whenever there is an opportunity to boo someone or something at these games or concerts, the people do so loudly and almost as excitedly as they cheer when the band/team comes out. With ridiculous entertainment prices, there is almost no show or game people will leave happy for, because they know that once it ends there may be hours of sitting in traffic & the no-one-wants-to-do-it responsibility of finding a designated driver.

9. The NFL & NBA (tie). When America's two monoliths of popular sport were locked out heading into the summer, you would not hear the end of the whining from fans, saying how greedy and ego-driven the overpaid athletes & greedy owners were to deprive them of their favorite medication. Meanwhile, both sports thankfully ended their lockouts with very little fan causalty, and the fans still went to the games & still watched ardently as ever. Instead they began complaining about more normal things, such as their team's stupid signings and contracts, their team getting "cheated" by the refs, conspiracy theories between the league & certain franchises, & the insane ticket prices for bad seats and beer/food/merch prices at the arenas/stadiums.

10. Major League Baseball. Even though baseball had no labor problems this year, the diminishing attention spans of Americans & lack of Big Five sports markets in the later rounds of the playoffs (no NYC, Chicago, Boston, or LA teams past the divisional round), kept the masses less than interested in the game of baseball in 2011. Even during the summer, they took every chance to complain about it: "It's not as exciting as football", "I just don't have the time for our crap team" , & "The games go on for too damn long!" being among the top rants, as well as the obligatory tickets/ballpark beer/parking/merch prices & greedy ownership grumbling.

11. BlackBerry. Almost everywhere, you hear "I fucking hate my Blackberry". It has a typepad the size of my hand & apparently the best email answering interface so people can type constantly, but everyone who has one always grumbles: either they need an IPhone but can't afford one, they need their apps, they need a better provider, their calls drop, or they can't stand RIM interface. Either way, very rarely will you hear anyone discussing how much they love their Blackberry.

Honorable Mentions: FourSquare: "Why do people feel the need to f'ing broadcast where they are?? I don't freakin' care. Can't stand that shit", Time Warner, NBC: "The Office just isn't funny anymore. WHYYYY?", Happy Madison Productions, Twitter: "I just don't get Twitter/Why do people feel the need to tweet everything they do/I don't f'in care what celebs are doing", HBO: "They charge like 200 bucks extra on my cable bill for like, 2 shows." & "They got Curb, one of the best shows ever, but what else? True blood? I don't have time for vampire sex" (Actual quote overheard in office hallway)

Companies that did NOT make the cut: Congrats to Apple (RIP Steve Jobs), Google/Youtube, Microsoft, ESPN, Spotify, Wal-Mart, Craigslist, Monster, Coachella, JetBlue, The Green Bay Packers, and every other major tech/food/sports/clothing/accessories corporation that did not make it. Either you had a great year & products that everyone agreed were cool (I-I-Iphone?), your products or services didn't have enough buzz to even be considered for casual conversation, or your haters were really discrete & generally kept their mouths shut. Here's to another great year in corporate America!